Lunar New Year 2023

Did you know that in some countries that celebrate the Lunar New Year, it lasts for about two weeks? Lots of businesses in China and Taiwan shut down completely during this time. This year's Lunar New Year celebrations, starting the Year of the Rabbit, will come to an end this weekend.

My MIL and my kids in 2016

San Francisco's Chinese New Year Parade is pretty famous and it usually takes place at the end of the holiday. When my husband and I lived in California, we made a trip to Chinatown one year when our oldest son was a toddler to watch the parade in-person. It was a lot of fun! Since then, we make a point to try and find a broadcast of the parade online to watch as a family. This year will be no exception with the parade happening tomorrow evening, February 4th. 

My husband's family is from southern China, and these are some of the traditions that we've woven into our family. From what I have learned, these are similar among many Chinese families. 

It's tradition for folks to spend this time with their families; especially if they don't live close to them. It's considered lucky to wear red and there are lots of traditions one follows to ensure an auspicious new year. Many families do a thorough clearing of their home to sweep out any bad luck from the previous year. It's actually considered bad luck to clean your house, or cut your hair, on Lunar New Year's Day because you will sweep out any new good luck or cut your chances for a prosperous new year. 

My oldest not knowing what to do with his lucky money.

On Lunar New Year's Eve, families usually get together for a big dinner chocked full of dishes that represent positive aspirations for the new year. There is often steamed whole fish (prosperity), chicken (togetherness) or duck (loyalty), noodles (long life), and dumplings (wealth). It's not uncommon for families to come together to make dumplings for this meal. Deep fried spring rolls are also common because they look like little gold bars.

We sometimes have sweet desserts, but my in-laws have tried to teach my kids that oranges and tangerines (success & wealth) make a great dessert too. And they are luckier with the stem and leaves still attached. Some years, my mother-in-law has made sweet, deep-fried, sesame cookies called zhà má yè.    

Here’s a website that has some really wonderful Chinese recipes that are popular around the Lunar New Year.

This year my husband smoked a whole duck and my mother-in-law steamed a whole fish. We had sweet, sticky rice, that had diced char-siu (bbq pork), onions, ginger, and mushrooms. We had homemade bao (buns) to make little sandwiches with slices of the smoked duck, spring onion, and hoisin sauce; similar to Peking Duck.

Our Lunar New Year dinner this year

Of course, the part my kids most look forward to: Lucky Money! Pronounced lai see in Cantonese or hong bao in Mandarin. Traditionally children and unmarried adults receive red envelopes from parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles that contain money. Sometimes they have a "lucky" amount too. The number eight sounds very similar to "get rich" in Chinese, so it's considered a very lucky number. We've often seen dollar amounts given in eights ($8, $88, etc.).

My kids digging into their red envelopes in 2016, back when they were still cute!

My in-laws and my husband's aunts also give our kids red envelopes for their birthdays. My mother-in-law still gives my husband and me a red envelope at the Lunar New Year and on our birthdays too.

In celebration this year, I created a Lunar New Year cootie catcher. The symbolic items on there are pretty specific to many Chinese traditions. You can purchase and download a printable file from my Etsy shop.

Are you from a country that celebrates the Lunar New Year? If so, how do you traditionally celebrate? I would love to make a cootie catcher that is unique to how you celebrate. Are there different symbolic foods, items, or animals in Vietnam, Thailand, or Korea? Anywhere else? Please share!

Donating Breastmilk, My Story

*I wrote this in the spring of 2017 (back when I ran a parenting blog). I was working on weaning my youngest and how I handled an oversupply of milk.

As humans, we’ve developed ways to donate blood, tissue, organs, and even sperm and ovarian eggs in recent generations, but human milk has been shared since women began having babies. I first learned about milk donation when my mom told me that she had donated milk when I was a newborn. In 1978, a time when breastfeeding rates were pretty low, she had a lot of extra milk but she couldn’t bear to pour it down the drain. Through the Nursing Mother’s Counsel, someone came to her house to drop off sterile bottles and then pick them up once my mom had filled them and bring them to a HMBANA milk bank in San Jose, CA. She didn’t even have a breast pump that worked very well back then, she hand expressed her milk!

Cut to 2009 when my oldest son was a newborn. I became friends with five mamas I met in our Bradley Method Childbirth class and we got together a couple of times a week when our babies were all newborns. We chatted, nursed our babies, commiserated about postpartum life, bonded, and breastfed lots more. One mama mentioned that there was a milk bank locally that gave mamas a brand new breast pump as compensation for donating (this bank has since closed). I was curious about it since I’d just dropped $300 on my breast pump (this was before insurance covered pumps!), and I did a little research on what the requirements were. I learned that they required a minimum donation of 80 ounces at once. After going back to work, I had an oversupply and I was running out of room in my freezer. The week I was going to get the process started, a massive earthquake shook Haiti. The outpouring of support was huge and every time I called the milk bank, I heard a recorded message saying they were so overwhelmed with donations for Haiti that they didn’t have anyone available to take my call. I left three messages and when I never heard back, I gave up.

We ended up using most of the milk I had in my freezer anyway. My oversupply evened out and my day care provider was overfeeding my son at times, so by the time he was seven months old, I had almost nothing left in my freezer. In hindsight, I guess it was a good thing I didn’t donate milk, but it would have been nice to share some of my excess.

Four and a half years later, my second son, M was born and I was able to be a SAHP. I still had my breast pump and I only pumped to relieve engorgement rather than to try and build a stash in the freezer. The few times my husband or my mother-in-law tried to give M a bottle, he hated it and screamed. Since I was not working outside the house full time, it was easier for me to just keep nursing and not bother with bottles at all. 

I had an oversupply again and my youngest slept in longer stretches than my oldest did as a newborn. So I often found myself engorged and needing to pump to relieve the discomfort. Within a week, I was running out of room in my freezer and needed to figure out what to do with it. Throwing it away was simply NOT an option.

Why didn’t I donate through an official milk bank?

When my youngest son was born, there was no HMBANA bank close to me in Utah (only CA or CO) and I would have needed to donate a minimum of 150 ounces for them to pay for me to ship frozen milk to them. I have learned that this has now changed and the 150 ounces doesn’t have to be all at once. At the time, I didn’t have enough milk to meet that minimum, but I still had milk to donate; milk that would be thrown away or made into popsicles since my son wouldn’t take a bottle. There are a multitude of reasons why I chose not to wait until I had enough milk, but one of them was because I needed the freezer space.

Another reason I chose to donate locally was because of how much banks typically charge families for donated milk. I totally understand that it costs money to run a milk bank with lab screening, donor screening, pasteurization, etc. But I really struggled with the idea of families having to pay between $4 and $6 per ounce for donated milk; milk that was free for me. Sometimes health insurance will cover it if a doctor writes a prescription, but it’s up to the family to submit a claim and get reimbursement from insurance. If a family would rather give their baby breast milk than formula for whatever their reason, especially if it’s not due to a medical issue, it made me sad how expensive it would have been for them. That reason is why I was perfectly happy to donate locally.

With how I donated milk, there wasn’t an official process. I posted in my local Eats on Feets and HM4HB Facebook groups to find a recipient. These are networking tools to help mamas with milk get in touch with mamas and babies who need it. They focus entirely on networking and make it very clear that any donor screening, milk screening, medical information, and advice is 100% up to the mamas to figure out.

I shared how much milk I had, where I was located, and the fact that I was on no prescription medications, not consuming alcohol, a non-smoker, and I also included that I do consume dairy products (since some babies can be sensitive). I made it clear I was only interested in meeting someone locally for milk, I was not willing to ship it.

From there, I got a few messages from moms who were interested and we chatted. I had one dad send me a message claiming he was looking for milk for his wife, but I told him I wasn’t comfortable donating milk to a man if I didn’t also get to meet the mom or the baby who would be drinking it. I know there’s a niche market for breast milk fetishes and body builders drinking human milk, but I was not comfortable donating to them.

I met the first mama at a local museum where I met her and her little boy. She suffered from insufficient glandular tissue and wasn’t able to produce enough milk to feed her baby. His tummy struggled with most formulas, so she was looking to donor milk. He ended up having a sensitivity to cow’s milk products, so he only got a little bit of my milk.

The second mama I donated to was a rock star! We met at a local restaurant and she explained that she had just adopted a newborn baby boy and she was inducing lactation so she could breastfeed him. She struggled to produce enough, so she looked to donor milk to supplement. She brought tears to my eyes with her story because it was something I had considered back when we struggled to get pregnant with my youngest son. If we had gone the adoption route, I had hoped to breastfeed too. 

My major take-away from this experience:

I am in the process of weaning my youngest son who’s 2.5 and while I am SO done with nursing, I know I will miss it tremendously. The pride and confidence it gave me as a mother is really hard to describe, but it’s a feeling I will hold onto for the rest of my life. 

Wet nursing and milk sharing was a societal norm until the invention of formula, and it makes me sad that it’s not at all common today among family members and close friends. It’s often discouraged and considered too risky. People are often skeeved out by the thought of milk sharing in any capacity, even when studies have proven that it can be a safer and healthier alternative to formula for many babies. Donated milk is saving the lives of NICU babies and preemies every day. Milk sharing was an integral part of life for new mamas in previous centuries. If a mama struggled to breastfeed or was ill, she could count on a lactating sister, cousin, or a friend to be able to nourish her baby. I would love to see that sense of “village” restored some day.

A Mom’s Superpower to Combat Busy Life

You ever have times in your life where there is just so much going on, you don’t feel like you can catch your breath? Life has been busy for us these months; pretty much from April-on. It’s the kind of busy where I’ve done plenty of Instagram-worthy things, but haven’t managed the time to post about them. And then when I do have a minute to breathe, I don’t want to do anything at all.

A few years back, when I ran a parenting blog, we asked all of our writers/moms if they could have any superpower, what would it be?

One mom’s answer really stuck with me and I still think of it from time to time… mostly times like right now.

She wished she had a superpower where her body did not need sleep. Between working full-time, caring for her family, and all of the day-to-day things that consumed her available time, she realized that if she didn’t need sleep, there were so many hobbies and interests she could pursue.

In a nutshell, she never really had time for herself, and she felt this most profoundly when her children were young. Her kids are older now, and I hope she has been able to find more time to devote to her own interests.

Times when I feel overwhelmed, like there simply aren’t enough hours in the day to do All. The. Things., I think of this mom and her desired superpower and I wonder just how much I could get done if I didn’t also have to sleep.

Me with a couple of fellow kick-ass moms. Image by Michelle Craig Photography

Cuz like, I’ve done a bunch of things this year that could earn their own blog posts (and will eventually)…

• My oldest son and I had our belt graduation where we finally got our black belts in taekwondo (it’s been pretty fun to wear in class).

• I flew to the Bay Area by myself for a weekend to say farewell to the man who was a second dad to me growing up (fuck cancer).

• Went on a wonderful retreat in southern Utah with a bunch of amazing women.

Image by Michelle Craig Photography

• Family road tripped to Reno where my kids competed in a taekwondo tournament to qualify for Nationals.

• Both my kids did competition track & field for the first time and were killing it at track meets and learning new events and skills.

• I have a new gig as social media manager and graphic designer for our competition running club (follow us! @wolfpackingrunningutah on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok).

• I got some new tools for my freelance work that I’m excited to share about.

• My parents came to Utah for a visit and we were able to take my dad on a couple of our favorite hikes.

My boys with my dad on the trail to Cecret Lake in Albion Basin.

• My paternal grandma passed away at the age of 102.

• My kids both competed in USA Taekwondo Nationals in July and my oldest earned a gold medal in black belt sparring in his age and weight class.

• I dipped my toes into the world of art festivals and had a booth at two local festivals. It was really fun and I actually made a few bucks. Show #1 and Show #2. I also entered two paintings into a city art show and I won a 2nd place ribbon!

• I made the decision to begin training for my 2nd degree black belt in taekwondo and will decide when to test (either next May or next December).

• My youngest son was asked to be the main character in a short film that is both a comedy and horror and learned a ton about how films are made.

• Both of my kids are doing competition cross country and are doing awesome at meets. They both are hoping to qualify for USATF Jr Olympic Nationals in Texas in December.

• My family was heartbroken by the loss of a taekwondo friend who took his own life just before he turned 15.

So yeah… it’s been a busy and tough year, and I have had many moments where I wished I could skip a night’s sleep so I had more time. September was crazy with our kids playing three different sports, plus school, birthdays, a funeral, and lots of emotions. October has been more chill and I am hoping as the weather cools off, November will continue to be chill. Fingers crossed.

Trying to relax on Gooseberry Mesa and enjoy the view.

10 Signs Your Child Might be a Foodie

How many of us start out this parenting gig thinking we’re not going to “let” our kids become picky eaters? We introduce them to a variety of flavors and textures early on and make sure they are encouraged to try everything. You try expose them to foods from different ethnicities, then watch helplessly as they spiral into the threenager stage and will only eat mac n cheese, chicken nuggets, and foods that aren’t “noisy” or “squishy.” What went wrong?!?!

I think most of us can agree, even the most devout of foodies will have kids who go through picky phases. We just have to do our best to keep showing enthusiasm, rule out or work with any allergies or sensitivities to textures or flavors, and do our best to muddle through it; hoping for change as they get older.

My kids went through very picky phases. For a while my oldest wouldn’t eat beef because “it takes too long to chew.” As a toddler he LOVED broccoli, peas, and spinach and then at age four he refused to eat anything that was green.

My husband and I are both big foodies. We try to make a variety of different foods at home and now that our kids are well passed the toddler stages, we usually include them in meal planning. When we travel, what we can eat plays a big role in deciding where we go and we make a point to not eat at restaurants that we have at home. 

I’d love to think that our enthusiasm when it comes to food played a role in how un-picky our kids have become, but I know a LOT has to do with their personalities. We have plenty of foodie friends whose kids are still struggling to outgrow their pickiness.

HERE ARE THE SIGNS:

1. In their head, trying new foods is an adventure rather than a chore or something to fear. Almost ALL samples are tasted at grocery stores and Costco. Latest discovery? Pâté. Our grocery store was sampling a rosemary and duck pâté, spread on little toasts and my son literally closed his eyes and moaned with his first bite. Then he asked if we could buy some for Dad, not knowing that he already loves pâté. 

2. Ask them their favorite food and it will be something many kids (and even many adults) don’t care for or think is gross or weird. My kid? Salmon sashimi. Shoyu ahi poke (raw, marinated tuna). Deep fried chicken livers. Lengua (beef tongue) or cabeza (beef head) tacos.

3. It’s library day at school and your kid checks out cookbooks instead of books about Fortnite or soccer.

4. Their birthday is coming up and rather than ask for a party at the local trampoline park or playground, they ask for a Chopped or Iron Chef-themed party at the local grocery store that has cooking classes. 

5. “What do you want for dinner?” is followed by requests for Japanese teppanyaki, Korean BBQ, Indian curries, or Hawaiian plate lunches.

6. Trying a new recipe? During dinner your foodie kids critique the dish with an assessment worthy of Iron Chef: “The texture is wonderful, but I think it needs to be seasoned a little more.” “I love the blend of flavors, but maybe a side of rice would be better than pasta.”

7. Foodie kid opts for summer cooking classes instead of ninja warrior camp or taekwondo camp.

8. While on vacation you have to explain to your child that they cannot have salmon or tuna for six days in a row… because there’s a mercury thing. I have actually had to have this conversation with my oldest. 

9. When having dinner at a sushi restaurant, your foodie kid ditches their family to sit at the sushi bar and chat with the chef about where the tuna came from or different ways to prepare salmon.

10. Your foodie child skips the cereal or candy aisle at the grocery store and instead browses different spice blends and the meat counter to see what’s on sale. 

I’m so, so grateful we’ve left the picky phase with my kids. Every day I count myself lucky that there are almost no foods that my kids won’t at least taste. They’re still working on foods that are even remotely spicy and raw veggies and salads are still a no-go, but we’re getting there.

Black Belt Graduation

My oldest son and I both earned our Kukkiwon 1st Dan black belts in taekwondo back in October of last year. You can read about my taekwondo journey and me feelings regarding the test here and here’s a rundown of the test itself and my thoughts afterward (spoiler alert: it was really fucking hard).

What does that have to do with art or graphic design? Nothing. But this is my blog and it was pretty cathartic for me to write out my thoughts, so there we go.

We were finally able to have our graduation ceremony a couple months ago in March. Apparently it took a long time for the official certificates to get here from Korea.

Friends and family were invited to attend. Our master instructors were there along with a few studio instructors who were integral to our training. This was seriously a team effort!

The beginning of the graduation involved a trail run up a pretty steep hill where we were all presented with our black belts. I was the LAST one up the damned hill because I didn’t see which direction the group went and I went the wrong way. Also, it was ridiculously muddy, I almost fell multiple times.

We took lots of photos at the top of the hill and then headed back to our studio.

This photo is me with my husband. Anyone who has parented a child through the physical and mental preparation that goes into a martial arts black belt test would agree that there should be a black belt for parents. We have watched quite a few parents go through it and we wholeheartedly agree that they've earned their own kind of black belt.

Compound that with supporting your spouse going through the same-but-different preparation too and you have the level of awesomeness that my husband achieved. It took me a long time to put these feelings into words; which is apparent since our black belt test was months ago.

Part of me didn't want to test alongside my son because I worried that I would focus too much on his training at the expense of my own. My husband was the rock that supported our preparation and it took on multiple forms... Pushing our son when he wanted to quit or refused to listen to me anymore (which was a lot). Commiserating with me and offering ice/heat/massage/ibuprofen when I was in pain. Humoring me when I questioned why the hell I was doing this. Cooking dinner pretty much every night, including the 4-5 nights/week for 2-3 hours we were at the studio. Encouraging me to go to class when I didn't want to, but in a way that wasn't a guilt-trip. Coordinating with other parents to make sure we had support during our black belt test. Making sure uniforms were clean, sparring gear was accounted for, and belts and weapons were always in the car.

I don't know if I would have passed if I hadn't been able to put parenting (and sometimes adulting) on the back burner many nights and I feel like my husband earned this belt almost as much as me.

Wholeheartedly, thank you babe.

Back to the graduation…

We headed back to our studio and changed into uniforms. Our master instructor said a few words about what being a black belt means and how hard we worked for them. Then we all got our belts, one by one.

Actually, there IS a tiny bit of graphic design in this post because I do most of the graphic design for our studio. Here is the printed program I created for our graduation. These were 8.5x11 inches, folded in half, and printed on card stock at our local Office Depot. I kept the color scheme simple with black, gray, and red.

The back cover had a bunch of messages that I asked parents to write to their kids and there is one message from my husband to Rachel and me (the two non-kids). I felt it was a bit too personal to share publicly, but it looked beautiful too.

Lastly, here’s a video one of our master instructors made about our test. She’s pretty darned good at it.

So, that’s it.

But you know the crazy part? I’m thinking about testing for my 2nd degree black belt in October of this year…